Day 84 (featuring the Monday Mugshots)

So, we've reached the end of cycle 4 and the formal end of chemotherapy treatment. But as one journey ends, so another begins - this time it's the fight back to fitness (physical and mental) and all those unwanted side effects, from tinnitus to the way people treat you. With that in mind, the Monday Mugshots (all taken within 5 minutes of each other) give an interesting psychosocial take on how you all (in the widest possible sense) have treated someone who looks like me.....

Hard Man

Victim

Dude

Oh, he'll look OK when his hair grows back......

Take your pick! For what it's worth, I don't recognise or identify with any of them. Residual self-image is still stuck in end-of-last year mode. Maybe it will change as the hair comes back? (.... just hope it's not ginger or curly... or both!)

Weekly reviews for a month or so from here on in. Thanks for reading - hope you have laughed or learned something.... preferably both.

Day 83

Penultimate daily post !

....well, nearly end of the chemotherapy road, anyway. As I've said before, I ain't doing this again. CT scan today, and guess what?

.... quite. Technician even more untalkative than usual, which means either it was a boring scan ('cos there was nothing in it) or I'm a goner, and what with it being a Sunday etc., he didn't want to be the one to break it to me. Guess we'll have to wait until after my oncology meeting on Friday, then (yes you'll get a weekly update for a bit.... if not posted, then you might hazard a guess at the prognosis....

Day 82

Slight technical hitch posting today, as the Blogger interface wouldn't let me into my own blog (courtesy of having several Google GMail accounts and trialling one on a Kindle Fire HDX). Anyway, I'm no techie - confirmed by the fact it took an hour of pratting about with password retrieval issues to get back into my own stuff - duh!

Hmm, maybe chemo brain kicks in after a couple of days trying to work..... or maybe the problem is internal hardware?........

Anyway, silicon interface apart, there's not much to report today, other than a bit more tiredness. There's a CT scan to look forward to tomorrow (I know it's a Sunday, but these things now run 24/7) so IT issues permitting, tomorrow's post will either confirm my imminent death, or that the Grim Reaper is really the Fonz.......

Day 81

So another late post, due to the usual Friday problems today with the M5/6……………….

It's ridiculous, innit? I mean, why is the BMW lane the slowest, with lanes 1 and 2 moving (just) and all the BMW's stationery in the fast lane?… er, OK, maybe I CAN guess why…….

Yes!, just  imagine a line of BMW-driving muppets (in the rain) and well, between the stamping on the accelerator (swiftly followed by the brakes), maybe we have our answer….

So how did it go today? - well yes, I am a bit tired, but the meetings went well, and that's perhaps down to autopilot…. maybe the old dog just knows what works, irrespective of an IQ of 147 or 115……..

Day 80

Another late post today, as I've been off on some work meetings this morning (which went well). Not feeling quite so tired - but the residual chemo stuff is going to take time to shift, I guess.

In case you hadn't seen it, this guy has put in one hell of a cancer charity result - wow! - hats off to him.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-stoke-staffordshire-27138100

Also working again tomorrow, so it will be interesting to see if the tiredness 'catches up'…. watch this space.

Day 79

Bit late posting today as the back-to-school bunfight got in the way…… kind of. Anyway, there was a potential issue as the Yummy Mummy 4x4 had been sold, and with no replacement in sight, questions were being asked as to how Ed was going to get his trunk and associated clobber back for the summer term……..

But fear not! Brian has duly stepped up to the plate, and shown that he was more than man enough for the job. This has caused some consternation and concern from you-know-who, because if Brian can do it, then you don't need Pythonesque logic to dictate that there may be no need for the Yummy Mummy 4x4 replacement after all…..

Hmm, it seems that I might have a pivotal health decision to make here….. either continued recovery and lots of home-cooked, TLC etc., or something all together less appealing……

Day 78

Under a week to go now to day 84 and completion of cycle 4. The 4-hour sleeping pattern remains, as does the bizarre taste and awful tinnitus. On the plus side, giving up on all medicines has produced no worse 'sickness' - just the background nausea, plus the omnipresent 'fog' headache. The latter does not however preclude spotting the Torygraph's attempt to become the new Wail, what with another NHS scare story (clearly less important than the footy story, though, which gets the front page piccy).

Mind you, our Nige has beaten the Wail to it when it comes to xenophobic headlines…….. but maybe he has a point? 

Ah well, let's see what happens in a month's time………..… on quite a few fronts, then.

Day 77 (featuring the Monday Mugshot)

OK, let's get it over with, then……….

So is the cup half full, or half empty? I guess it depends on your viewpoint. Like today's Express and Mail, who both headline the same story…….. but in completely opposite ways. 

Of course this comprehensively illustrates why the Mail is such a poisonous rag. It turns normal people into cognitively challenged lower-middle class homophobic white monarchist xenophobes. I mean, just look at the pink banner story in the Mail - really? Despite my current chemotherapy-induced loss of 30-odd IQ points, I can tell you that the premise outlined is complete tosh. I do wish both Grannies would desist from taking any further 'advice' from this foul toe-rag. The evolutionary consequences are dire….. you have both been warned!

Day 76

Happy Easter everyone……… unless you're unlucky enough to have a Wonga loan, sponsored by the Church of England…..

More religious hypocrisy from people who should know better. More "do as I say, not as I do", but did anyone honestly expect more? Not me, for sure. All those religious offers of a 'cure' for cancer have to be viewed in this light.

Mind, you, the Torygraph doesn't just throw a punch at the C of E (bottom right) as Islam comes in for a bashing too (top left). All this on Easter Sunday too………. ho, hum…….

Day 75

OK, so everyone says testicular cancer is very treatable and there's a 90%+ success rate etc., but what if you're in the other 10%………

Problem is, no-one can tell you whether you're in the 90% or 10% category - until it's obvious. All goes to show that none of us know how much time we've got left……

…….these things always come from left of field, as in George's case - he's not overweight, looks healthy etc., but we're both hit from the blue with different cancers - he could still get mine, I could still get his……..

…… when there are much more likely candidates waddling around…………

Day 74

So it's not just The Wail having a go at the NHS today:

For sure, Gerrandpa is worried about the Walsgrave as he has a procedure there in June….. ………...but hang on, all this was in 2002 and we're in, er, 2014 now………...

Hmm, maybe the broadsheets (who should know better) think they can pull off a double whammy with an NHS + foreigner scare story? Come on Farage, why aren't you on this particular bandwagon (oh, it's Good Friday…… planning a trip to the pub, obviously). 

So, Uncle James has popped down from Cheshire, and will be needed to help Gerranny and Gerrandpa deal with the hazards of subscribing to medical knowledge solely from The Wail. As for me, I'm feeling much of a muchness (i.e. same as past few days) but enjoying the sunshine and someone else mowing the lawn……….

Memo the Gerrandpa: Told you The Wail was a poisonous rag ………….why not try this instead: http://www.nhs.uk/news/Pages/NewsArticles.aspx

Day 73

Oh dear, just as we were doing so well with Autotrader, Lee phones this morning and kicks off with "Hi Charles, how are you today?" ……. to which the answer is: "better now my chemotherapy has finished, thanks." Lee mumbles something, very embarrassed - another victim of the rampant health intro to sales calls….

Why on earth sales & marketing think it's a good idea to kick off with health-specific questions on unsolicited sales calls is bizarre. I mean, if I didn't have cancer, I might just be feeling a bit crook, or something - certainly not wanting to come clean on my hangover/rash/athlete's foot/whatever. Why would anyone want to share any health information with a total stranger? If it's a sales call, why not keep it on sales, not health? Any of you sales & marketing people listening? Even the Yanks keep off the subject with "Have a nice day".

Big cancer news in the press today (let's ignore the Wail, having yet another NHS-bashing session). So a 'cure' is is sight, eh? Hmm, the jury's out till the verdict's in, but no harm in having another string to the bow in the event the Grim Reaper comes knocking at the door again…..

Day 72

What is it with newspaper headlines and the NHS? - it's almost as if we've become immune to the constant barrage of NHS crisis stories. OK, so chemo brain or not, the answer is simple: tell everyone not from this country, who haven't contributed towards that NHS, that they are not entitled to medical care here. There - what's difficult or controversial about that? 

The law of unintended consequences comes with a technology flavour this morning, as my LinkedIn updates show that Axel has been checking out my profile yesterday…..

Come on Axel, everyone knows that you have to set up a secondary 'John Smith' type profile to avoid people knowing that you're web-stalking them. Anything I can immediately help you with? - I note we have a follow-up on 2nd May at 11am, so perhaps we can cover any outstanding questions you might have then?

By way of immediate update, yes I'm still very tired. Fed up with all the bloody pills so I'm not taking any of them now (most for anti-sickness) and guess what? - no difference. Trying to do some daily exercise now, but it's hard. The tinnitus is a major issue; maybe a 'white noise' device could help? 

http://simplynoise.com

Try the link above to see what I mean here. Anyone know anything more about this sort of thing?

Day 71

So things are a bit better this morning, as I've been taking it easy (Ed's on lawn duty). Interestingly, I've come across a few "now you're better…." type comments from others in the past day or so - whoa! - I'm not half a week out of hospital, so this is definitely more the triumph of hope over expectation……….

…..but maybe I'm out of hospital just in the nick of time, as it appears injurious to health to actually be there? Whilst the Mirror's headline is patently complete tosh, it does concentrate the mind on how much the NHS actually costs - are we really going to continue treating the world turning up on our doorstep for a medical freebie? (you tell me - it's our tax that pays for it). 

The other thing is the obvious waste - for example the heating on Ward 61 was cranked up so high that everyone was using fans to keep cool (not to mention having the keep windows as wide open as we could get them*). What about turning the heating down?…. er, computer sez no, I guess. What about all the medications I've been given, that are surplus or just plain wrong? (like most of the anti-sickness drugs they gave me last time e.g. Domperidone). Again, as they can't be re-used, in the bin they go, I guess…..

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-23405132

*Memo to NHS facilities managers: The silly 'nanny state' anti-suicide window restrictors you have clearly fitted at great expense can be unscrewed using a 2p coin. If you want to do something useful, get the bloody windows cleaned! (7 years since last wash - I have asked).

Day 70

OK, so we have a better understanding of 'don't overdo it' now. It's easy to come out of hospital and think "right, that's over, let's get on with it then", but unfortunately, whilst the spirit is willing, the flesh is indeed weak. So for all you chemo patients on last cycle - take a tip from me and don't try something over-ambitious (like mowing the lawn) the day after you get out of hospital.

Looking for a good-news cancer story in today's press, there was little to impress, however The Sun's health headline story did rather catch the eye. What the hell is an old lady, in hospital and on oxygen doing, being allowed to chuff away on e-cigs, anyway? Sounds all a bit Final Destination to me.

Anyway, The Beeb has managed come up with some topical news and advice to us chaps, about checking, er, our chaps:

See the whole article here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/26977094

"Tabloid readers are more likely to know how to check for lumps and bumps…" Oh dear, this is worrying………

Memo to grannies: Watch those e-cigs in hospital, grannies!

Memo to broadsheet readers: git yerself a red-top - you'll live longer (?)

Day 69

Well, the stripes look better in the sunshine today, ……. but I don't I'm afraid. 

Amazing how a 20-minute mowing session has had me absolutely chukkered…. taking it easy as a result……  let's see how things are tomorrow.

Day 68

So, got a bit carried away with it all  'being over' yesterday, and made rookie error of thinking that it was a 'normal' weekend - so cut the lawn (well, a bit of it before Ed had to take over…)

To be fair, you can see the stripes - but you can't see the resulting debilitating effect on the mowing man…. who spent all this morning in bed recovering from over-exertion. 

That'll teach him to bite off more than he can chew right now………..

Day 67

OK, so just noticed the mix-up on IBS/IOS in yesterday's post (whoops) - that's 'chemo brain' for you - never mind. It's good to be out of hospital and 4th cycle finished. Bad news in today's papers though (and I don't mean The Wail's headline on 'bungling officials missed 350,000 migrants' either)

One wonders why The Times thinks that the MP sex case is more important? - but this is bad news on the prostate front, chaps; go get it sorted asap. 

So I have the usual assortment of take-home drugs; bizarrely, Domperidone instead of Metoclopramide and Cyclizine (just as JB's copy letter to my GP arrives saying the opposite).   Incidentally, the aspirin point on the cisplatin is addressed, but only to say that "it could not be confidently recommended to prevent further hearing loss". With hindsight I would have preferred to try it, confident or not. On the other stuff, think I'll just dump the Domperidone - ditto the Dexamethazone (steroids) which appears to turn me into Mr. Angry with no appreciable anti-sickness benefit…..

No thanks!

Another week of Zarzio/Filgrastim jabs, plus some high-dosage Magnesium tablets round off  the menu. CT scan booked for the end of April, and a follow-up with JB at the beginning of May (plus a session with the specialist Germ Cell Nurse) round off the rest period, after which it's time to start rebuilding the demilitarised zone - 6 month target to get back into shape, grow some hair (and higher brain function re-aquisition). Switching to weekly updates at that stage……..

Day 66 - Route 66?

ROUTE 66

OK, so last day of chemotherapy treatment, and it feels like nearly all 2,448 miles of Route 66 so far - on the plus side it ends in Southern California (not the Chicago end) .... not that there's anything wrong with the windy city…… it's just a bit, er windy… and cold.

So here's the last Angel of the group.....

Er, easy on the airbrushing Jaclyn - this is how you looked without all that artificial enhancement.....

So, let's get The Wail's final contribution whilst we're at it.....

'NHS writing off patients who are over 75' - really? Empirical evidence in Ward 61 is that this is simply not true - you want to get your lazy hacks out the pub and into the real world... and leave the nurses out of it too....

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2598735/Cancer-patient-calls-999-HOSPITAL-BED-shouts-help-ignored-nursing-staff.html

Again, really? - this is patently absolute tosh - and the bloke looks 83 if he's a day (and having cancer treatment to boot). All this Wail nonsense is giving me irritable bowel syndrome....