2018 Update

Bet you thought I was dead, huh?   no ...not quite yet!!

.... sorry I've not been posting for a bit - tbh it was a change of computer/website access issue with blogspot which I hadn't really had time to fix - which I've had to following an unpleasant IT attack (you know, the "you pay $5,000 in Bitcoin or we'll send all your email contacts the film we made using your webcam"... er, do these idiots not realise what type of cancer I've actually had??

Anyway, the only 'girls' I want to have a cuddle with my wife knows all about (see below)

So say hello to Stella the PBGV (French Bassett Hound) - believe you me, she's the only other blonde a man of my age (and condition) should want on his lap!

Hmm, can't quite believe it's 4.5 years post treatment now - only another 6 months to go until the 5 year 'all clear' and they kick me off the follow up/review list - 'cured' as it were. Not quite there yet, but here's hoping - and looking forward to it.

In the meantime, I shall sign off for now with a suitably charitable thought - sure, my kebab's up for grabs if I don't make it.....

Happy 2019 everyone - make it a great year.

2020 update will be my last for this 'series'. Who knows what's around the corner for all of us? Hell, we've got Brexit in March! - so let's follow General Patton's advice and cross bridges when we get to them....

Where's the bloody picture then?

Ah, sorry.... been kind of tied up for the past 6 months, so half-yearly sweep of misc bits outstanding has revealed that the post Michael-the-Pouffe trim had not actually been posted.

I guess the suspense is crippling? ... (or maybe not!) So, this is me now:

Keen-eyed readers will note that I'm in nautical navigation mode... yes! - it was taken on the river yesterday. Who needs a villa in the South of France when we've having such a great British Summer at home?

OK, so the boat still 'needs work'.... let's pencil that in for August.... which I hope to be, despite the best efforts of The Grim Reaper.....

Hmm, double-rear blow-out the other week, but not a scratch on me. The guy with the scythe is obviously pissed that I've won the last few rounds, but I guess he's getting used to it.

3-year check up last month put me on 12-month oncology follow-up, so only 2 more of those to go before I'm out-of-the-woods....

OK, so I know he's out there, and he's holding all the cards - but I keep dodging the bullets. Here's hoping it stays that way......

2016 Update

So, no post yesterday so you thought I had bought the farm?

Er no, far from it - still very much alive and kicking (sorry mom).

The reasons I didn't post yesterday are many:

1. OS software update dumped all of my saved passwords (really) so I couldn't get back into my blogspot account (not having used it for a year).

2. Tor has me booked in with Michael (aka "the poof"- according to Colonel Cobb) for a haircut costing £30+ (as opposed to my usual £10 + £1 tip local effort down the road) and wanted me to look my best for the annual mugshot.

3. I'm in rude health, so quite forgot.

It's been a very busy year, but as you are all (possibly) immediately more interested in my health, check out the update below:

Reassured that the NHS is providing a CT scan a couple of years post-chemo?.... er no, they didn't - this was 'purchased' by me as a private 'customer' (as opposed to 'offered' to me as a 'patient'). Wow, how times change.

So why was I having a CT scan anyway? - well, I have had a bit of a cough for 6 months now... so after the initial 'OMG it must have metastasised in his lungs' panic subsided, what exactly was the problem?  Various antibiotics, steroid inhalers, decongestants etc etc later - nothing, no effect, zip. Mind you I didn't actually feel 'ill', so what was the actual problem?

Hmm, well I'd need a load of (more) tests of course, lung function (110%) allergy (just the usual grass pollen) sputum (nil points) and of course the CT (see above).... which all comes to well over £1,000 to provide the answer which is..... er, nothing. Wot, a grand for nothing? - yup, that's about it. 

Respiratory Specialist thought it was most probably a side-effect of dust from the house conversion. I am assured that something similar is present at Everest base camp (cough), so there you have it. Anyway, a complete update will be posted in the next couple of days, so I'll leave you to contemplate the potential efforts of Michael the poof.......

2015 Annual Update

Well, I'm still here! 18 months and counting (er no, not really... OK they're counting... so another three-an-a-half years to go then?)

After a fair few offers on a number of houses (future potential book/film on nightmare vendors there, so won't open that can of worms right now) we stumbled across the perfect do-er-upper in a magical position and took a leap of faith in August, moving into a 500-year old cottage that hadn't had money spent on it for over 40 years.

Oh yes, and a river runs through the garden, so (obviously) I bought a boat ........so what could be better than having a pootle down the river on New Year's Day?

Oh dear, it seems that 'JB' and the BHOC/BRI have run into a bit of difficulty......

OK OK, I know it's the Daily Wail, but it gets worse..............

Pleased to see they are 'taking this seriously'. When I see JB next week for my check-up, I will 
get the full story.

Next we have...... ah yes, more cancer news:

Yes, they hammered the sugar = cancer equation home at Penny Brohn. Look on the bright side, at least they're leaving the booze out of it.... 

What?.....oh sorry - it appears we can't even drown our sorrows these days. I would normally sign off with a Cheers - Happy 2016! but as there's new guidance to the contrary, all I can say is stay happy and healthy and keep dodging the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune....

Annual Update

Well, the x-ray last week was clear, and no-one's phoned to say anything worrying about the blood test.... so that's it for another couple of months, then. No MRI or CT.... I guess they're only going do do those if x-ray or bloods shows something's up.

Cancer's back in the news today.... not surprising really - that's about 4% of the population currently living with it. 30 years ago it was half that, mainly because the other half were already dead. There are some pretty diverse views about the benefits (or otherwise) of this:

Well Doc, sorry to rain on your parade, but if you had said that to me last year, then you would have had to pop downstairs to A&E afterwards. Not quite ready to shuffle off this mortal coil at only 52, you see.... but I'll keep you posted, OK?

A year in......

Well, I'm still here....

Scans and blood tests all negative.... now just coming up to anniversary of initial surgery last year, and everything appears to be 'on target'. Shame about the tinnitus and 'chemo brain' - still, you can't have it all, I suppose.

Annual review to take place in early January - that's the one where the negative scan and blood readings really matter, so fingers crossed, eh?

A thought for you all:

None of us knows how much time we have left. 

Really, it's that simple.

All best for 2015 to you all,

Charles

August 2014 Update

Well, 3 months after the end of the 4th cycle, this is how I'm looking....

OK, so the hair is back (which is good) but the 'chemo brain' and tinnitus haven't gone away (which is bad). Oncology view is that both will take some time - probably a year (which is bad). Still, the 3 month scan last week was clear (which is good).

The Penny Brohn 'Living Well' course was..... interesting. Sure I can see it does the bits the NHS doesn't, but I'm not really the one who needed much help on the diet & exercise front (being married to a full Colonel in the Food Police......)

Still, it's good work that they do there so check it out for yourselves:

http://www.pennybrohncancercare.org/

Yes, well we all know (or should know) that Beer Burger 'n Fags are NOT your BBF when you've been through what I have, but c'mon, its August... the odd BBQ 'ain't gonna hurt... really it's not...

So, the next waypoint is the 6-month scan in the Autumn - I'll keep you posted. In the meantime....

Update 10.6.14

OK, so the 'CBT' session wasn't really CBT - just an holistic update on how everything was going. So you get a form with a tickbox exercise to then discuss. People are different; some have difficulties that others don't. Some people have real difficulty with appearance, weight, emotion, sex, whatever. Everyone has the 'brush-with-death' and 'living on borrowed time' aspects that affect them, to a greater or lesser degree. I just want my brain back 100% and the bloody tinnitus to stop. Oh yes, I need to keep away from the damn beehive when mowing, as one of the little b*stards managed to sting me somewhere nasty......

...... but the good news is that was last week, so this is how I look now:

Eagle eyed readers will see that the hair is nowv making a determined comeback. The colour has been variously described as everything from 'ash' to 'salt 'n pepper'. Well, at least it isn't ginger and curly....... and at least I'm still here, and able to take Tor out tonight for our silver wedding anniversary (without looking like either a hitman or a victim).

So what's the pivotal quarter-century thought? - well, I'll tell you: no-one knows how much time they've got left, no-one at all. So just enjoy what you have, and don't put off doing anything that you really want to do, because two other things are also for sure; shrouds don't have pockets, and you're a long time dead.....

Lucky escape for me this time perhaps? ...... who knows. Nice to win a hand against the Grim Reaper, but never forget he's carrying all the aces...........

Weekly Update 26.5.14

So here's Uncle James joining in the 'get fit' drive, but for different reasons - he's stopped smoking (real ones, anyway) and it's starting to show a bit, around the middle......

Here's an over-the-shoulder selfie on the same run). Note (a) the increased 'ducky fuzz' (resulting in a sort of white Nick Fury look, I suppose) and (b) yes! - Uncle James is puffing hard, in second place!

Anyway, as you can see, progress is being made. There's the CBT (oh yes it is, Sue!) to look forward to at the end of next week, so an update will be provided then (unless detention under S.2/3 Mental Health Act is effected). Then there's the residential course in July to look forward to. In the meantime there's a son to pack off to India, and a daughter to the US. Thrown in an attempt to get a silver wedding trip in (and another house move) and all I can say is that it's been one hell of a year thus far..........

Weekly Update 19.5.14

So you can all see the effort being put into trying to get fit again, I'm introducing a new get-fit sport suitable for chemotherapy patients. As some Doubting Thomases are bound to question the the authenticity of the claim, I'm attaching 'before' and 'after' photos as proof (and no, I have enough IT issues attaching photos, never mind photoshopping them as well). 

As you can see, the sport is 'miniature wire-haired dachshund cross-country time trials'. Bit of a mouthful I know, so it's being abbreviated to 'Dachshund TT'. So you pick a 5-acre circuit and trot around it, with the hounds in hot pursuit. Eagle eyed viewers will already have noticed that the deck is well and truly stacked in the recovering patient's favour, not least as the competition's legs (and pretty much everything else) are 10 times smaller... and that's before nasal distractions (pheasants, rabbits, foxes etc) throw the competition off the scent, as it were....

Man wins!

So although I'm starting out in fairly poor shape, victory is pretty much assured, thus building self esteem for 'keeping at it'. Target is to lose half a stone by the end of the summer, and be able to jog several miles without breaking a sweat..... on top of which the Food Police have cracked down on all sorts of stuff I never thought had any calories in (wine, crisps, chocolate)

I'll keep you posted.....